apaaya ?

apaya ? ih , bete gni gw gak ada gawe -,-
modal hape aja di tangan .. mau buka fb .. mls , ntah knp.. jadi buka blog , iseng ..
iiiiii .. beteeee !! bete am apa aja !
am bokap , nyokap , aldo , elo , semuaaaaa aaah !!!!!!!!!

tadi gue gk skola , gra2 mati lampu , jd mls ngpa ngpain .. jd gue putuskan untuk lanjutin tdr dan gak skola !
dan ? baru sadar gue , hape gue mati !
pantesan kgk ribut .. biasanya udh tinut tinut .. dring dring .. bunyi sms pda msk ke hape gue .. ntah dri tmn , recka .. ampe yg paling gk penting dri facebook ..
seharian gue cm diem di rmh , kaya ank autis .. ngotak ngatik laptop .. ampe di bentak bentak bokap ..
aaaah , 23 JULY 2009 ! gue bete bgt am hari ini ...
knp semuanya gak ada yg bisa buat bibir gue naek dikit buat sekedar senyum ?!
bawaannya seharian bete aja ! kalo misalnya hari ini juga gue skola , pasti gue tdr di kls .. huhu ..
idup gue kaya warna abuabu ! sureeeem ...
idup gue kaya boneka panda , cm item , sm putih .. klo gk item .. ya putih , gk ada warna laen -_____-
perasaan gue beberapa hari ini bener bener dataaaaaaar ....
senyum yg gue sunggingin ? baru gue sadarin , kalo PALSU !
ketawa yg gue keluarin ? PALSU juga ..
skrg di otak gue , gue gak liat jawaban ! cm pertanyaan , pertanyaan , pertanyaan .. yg belum kejawab ! dan kayaknya gak bakal bisa kejawab ..

" knp gue bete ? "
" knp idup gue gni gni aja ? "
" knp bawaan gue ahir2 ini bete aja ? "
" knp gue musti tau , kalo dia boong am gue ? "
" knp sahabat gue gak tau kalo gue lagi bete ? "
" knp bokap gue gak tau kalo gue gak bisa di bentak ? "
" knp lampu di rumah gue mati trs ? "
" knp hape gue mati trs ? "
" knp sms gue pending trs ? "
" knp tangan gue lemes bgt ? "
" knp rambut gue rontok ? "
" knp gue gak bisa ngantuk ? "
" knp gue males ngp ngpain ? "
" knpa da musti ngmg itu ? "
"knp air mata gue gk bisa keluar buat nangis ? "
" knp hidup gue surem ? "
" knp gue emosian ? "
" knp gue gak bisa ngerasa laper ? "
" knp gue gak gendut gendut ? "
" knp muka gue sll pucet ? "
" knp gue suka ngongek org ? "
" KENAPA DI OTAK GUE CM ADA PERTANYAAN ? "


todaay ? 23 july 2009 11:53 PM ..
IAM JUST STUCK IN HERE WITH NOBODY BESIDE ME ..
iam just waiting for someone answer , "why my life always like this? "
why don't you come ? and hold me in your arms ?
how could iam so stupit ? waiting .. for NOTHING !
can someone come , and take this pain away ?
i need someone beside me , and say " iam here for you , and never leave you alone "
you everything i wanted to be ..
why i wanna curl up like a cild ?
why I couldn't even get an answer ?
why you leave me ??


and all my tears .. they keep running down my face .. why don't you turn away ?
and say ..


" don't cry .. iam here for you gladytha .. "